MARRIAGE, ADULTERY, MASTURBATION AND PORNOGRAPHY (1)
WHY DO WOMEN TAKE THE DIVORCE OPTION? Keep on reading: She sat in front of my desk at the office, at about 11.00am, on a Monday morning, her eyes red from crying, even as gentle sobs wracked her body. Mary, an accountant in one of the first generation banks in Lagos, Nigeria, wiped the tears off her eyes as she stared at me, her pretty face marked with worry lines.
“I don’t know what to do, I am so confused.”
I stood up from my desk and tried to stretch a bit. I went to the refrigerator and got myself a glass of cold water.
“Can I offer you anything?” I asked politely.
She shook her head and continued sobbing. As I walked back to my desk I couldn’t help thinking it had been a long morning. I glanced at the wall clock, casually, not wanting her to think I was getting bored.
We had been talking, or to be exact, she had been talking and I had listened for about forty-five minutes, I couldn’t be bored. We were talking about Mary’s matrimonial problems. She was filled with anger, resentment and perhaps hate towards John, her husband.
Mary and John had been married for some ten years and had two lovely children. They were already committed Christians before they started dating and after getting married, they started attending a popular Pentecostal church in Lagos.
Mary had just decided that it was time to leave her husband. She couldn’t bear to live with him anymore. After all efforts to placate her failed, her Pastor sent her to me, a Christian Lawyer, to help her with the divorce. Her pastor, a dear friend, being aware of my position on divorce, actually sent her to me, hoping that God would use me to reach her.
In my younger days in the faith, I had prosecuted divorce cases, not seeing anything wrong with divorce. With time however, after a few messy divorce cases, I decided not to prosecute divorce cases, especially where both parties were Spirit filled children of God.
After asking some questions, I soon began to understand why Mary felt so bitter towards her husband. She was convinced that since her early days as a Christian, God had called her into the music ministry (Her pastor assured me later on, that she indeed had a remarkable voice and had been very active in the church Choir until recently)
When I asked her why she hadn’t pursed music as a career or ministry, she informed me tearfully that she couldn’t because it would have resulted in quitting her job and her husband was not keeping up with his financial responsibilities. She had become the breadwinner in her home, shouldering the children’s school fees, house rent and other domestic necessities.
Mary believed that the greatest mistake of her life was getting married to John. She felt trapped in the marriage and believed her life was simply wasting away. She constantly wondered if her destiny wasn’t tied to a career in Christian music industry.
I ran my hand over my head and tried to get directions from the Holy Spirit. After a few minutes, I felt I should ask her about their dating and courtship days. Her answers were quite revealing.